Tree of Life Meditation System -- Day 10 -- Auset

Hetep Everyone,

Thoughts pop into my mind all day. Most times -- no, I can't truthfully say that anymore -- quite often, these thoughts are awful, very negative scenarios. They come in the forms of daydreams, absorptions, moments of absent-mindedness, or emotional states. All of these forms are types of trances as described by Ra Un Nefer Amen in his book, Tree of Life Meditation System, page 200.

These forms of thought belong to the territory of Auset. It is Heru's job to interrupt these types of thoughts as they do not serve my efforts to subjugate my ego identity (Auset) to my Divine Being (Ausar). Growing stronger at interrupting these thoughts means that I am strengthening my skills at Men Ab meditation. This is a wakeful meditation, specifically designed to teach us how to vigilantly interrupt or block thoughts that do not serve our Divinity.

In addition to those runaway thoughts being negative and dis-serving, they are almost always false. They feed and energize dis-serving illusions that are difficult to discern. Almost always, this leads to dis-serving behavior and decisions based upon false information.

Being unable to distinguish between illusion and truth has gotten so bad for me that I have been unable to rely on my intuition. It's been like a vicious circle, chasing my own tail, trying to determine truth from illusion. In trying to develop the skills of Men Ab, I was working from the premise that the cultivation was a complex process, but now I feel that if I just learn to block those awful thoughts, I'll be able to advance from there as I grow in my understanding.

What does this have to do with my meditation objective? Once again, here is my objective: I want to experience my purpose in God's Divine plan based upon truthful premises, determined by relationships of how my functions (thoughts, feelings, and actions) fit the form I'm trying to create (my purpose).

Here is possibly the greatest insight I have received from this meditation cycle.

Choice is the main focus of conscious, deliberate meditation whether it is Men Ab or trance. If you have followed my meditation posts for a while, then you already know that I do not respond well to being or feeling forced to do things. I adopted this attitude to help me heal from childhood trauma. I have worked hard to learn how to change my perception to desire doing what needs to be done. That way, no force is necessary.

In fact, when those negative thoughts lean toward me feeling that I am forced to do something, I determine the truth of the thought by remembering that Maat's feather represents the lightness of the application of Divine Law. There is no coercion. We must choose. If we are not paying attention, we won't even know that we are being beckoned to follow the laws. This concept helps me to easily dismiss some of my negative thoughts.

Choosing to fit my functions (thoughts, feelings and actions) to the form of creating my Divine purpose is a way of providing structured guidelines for Men Ab meditations -- blocking negative, dis-serving thoughts that hinder my efforts.

The other side of choice, in terms of Heru, is that not only does Heru energy block those awful, behavior-stimulating thoughts, the energy can be used to replace those thoughts with visions and beliefs that support the behavior to create the form of my Divine purpose. It's sort of like a block and counter-punch at the same time.

The Heru energy is designed to fight the energy of Set. Set energy is the energy that we use to justify doing what we know is wrong -- like the saying, "The devil made me do it." Heru wins if we transcend Set's energy and make choices that advance our Divinity on earth. Set wins if we just spend a lot of time debating the issues of transcendence, not to mention, choosing what develops our ego selves.

To quote, Ra Un Nefer Amen from his book, Tree of Life Meditation System, page 177:

Heru is the set of energized ideas aimed at manifesting behavior on the basis of the identity of the waking consciousness with Ausar...Set is the set of energized ideas aimed at manifesting behavior on the basis of the identity of the waking consciousness with the person.

The key here for me is "energized ideas." These energized ideas work for or against our Divinity. The ideas become energized by the energies of spheres 7 (Het-Heru) and 8 (Sebek). The medium through which these energies travel is Auset energy -- trance.

We are now back where we started. Auset energy -- trance energy -- in the forms of daydreams, absorptions, moments of absent-mindedness, or emotional states represent the means of energizing the ideas that support either Divinity (Ausar) or ego (AuSet). I must add to the list of forms of trance, mediumistic trance -- formal sit-down sessions of meditation.

It boils down to this. Either we energize those dis-serving ideas unconsciously or deliberately (Set) or we consciously choose (Heru) to direct the content of our daydreams, absorptions, moments of absent-mindedness, emotional states, and, especially, mediumistic trance sessions. Mediumistic trance greatly assists our desire to use the Heru energy to consciously direct the content of our waking trance states toward our Divinity.

Here is the Law of Auset, personalized from the words of Ra Un Nefer Amen in his book, Maat: the 11 Laws of God.

Auset: I am prepared to sacrifice everything in order to become the vessel of God on earth. In return, I will receive everything.

How do I break the Law of Auset?

I have been guilty of ignoring and trivializing my cultivation of all forms of trance states.

Well, that's it for now. I wish you great fortune. Until next time,
Hetep

Tree of Life Meditation System -- Day 15 -- Heru

Hetep Everyone,

Well, it's happened. The surprise that I told you about in earlier posts has arrived. By surprise, I mean breakthrough. Yesterday, I realized that I had manifested something tangible from the Universe that I had wanted. As a result, I suffered a huge anxiety attack. This has been a repeated pattern in my life which has almost always led to shut downs and self-sabotage (We all handle things in different ways.). Thanks to the Tree of Life Meditation System (TOLM), I was able to recognize the source of anxiety and the symptoms of an oncoming attack.

The source of the attacks is trauma that I suffered during my infancy. Please don't ever think that because babies can't talk that they can't remember. Our brains are so powerful that they hold the memories of experiences of all our lifetimes. We just don't know how to access those memories. Okay, that's not true. This meditation system has that potential. My point is that what happens in our infancy has a huge effect on what kind of adults we become.

I heard a story, I think that it was told by Runoko Rashidi in one of his lectures, about some French scholars who went to Africa to study how Africans raise their children so that the Europeans could help them improve. The French folks discovered that the African children were far more advanced than European children, comparatively. One example, if my memory is correct, was that the African children were potty trained at six months. What was the explanation for this? The children never went without being touched. Even at night, someone always had a loving had on them, reassuring them of their connection to everyone else.

Conversely, here in America, one of the sayings that I've always heard when it comes to babies in the black community is, "Put that baby down! You'll spoil her!"

Dr. Frances Cress Welsing, in her book The Isis Papers recommends giving children unlimited access to your lap (Lap Time) until the age of 4, letting them decide when they're ready to get down.

I'm saying all of this because in our community we have been so far removed by slavery and segregation from the way that our ancestors reared us, that the European ways of neglect seem natural. Worse, hidden deep in our closets are the residual effects of slavery and segregation. I'm talking about child molestation.

This is some old European evil, that must be exposed if we are to heal it and get rid of it.

I remember watching this Katherine Hepburn movie called The Lion in Winter. The movie is set among their royalty in 1183 A.D. They talk about raping young boys like its some sort of delicacy (champagne, caviar, and a little boy, instead of a cigar). It was their nonchalant acceptance of such behavior, spoken within the same context of Christianity, that got me. If it happened among the royals, then it certainly got passed down to the wannabes. Don't even think of telling me that this didn't happen in slavery and that it still doesn't happen.

I believe that most people think that molestation is a female problem, but gender doesn't matter. Slavery brought this to our community and it is still running rampant, perhaps even more now than ever so this post is for everyone.

My mother suffered from what we today call postpartum depression, but she had always suffered from a mild form of mental illness stimulated by growing up during segregation in Shreveport, LA. She suffered a severe breakdown and couldn't take care of us. My father left us with people he trusted so that he could work two jobs. I don't think he ever knew what happened to us. My mother recovered enough to take care of us, but her childhood mental illness was left unchecked so we grew up with even more trauma. However, because of my dad and the fact that my mother's "episodes" were spaced out, although, sporadic, we also had a great deal of American "normalcy." My father died when I was 13. My mother didn't really begin to get the help she needed until I became an adult.

It wasn't for lack of trying. My mother always knew she needed help, but the doctors were white and uncaring. It took her decades to find the right kind of help. She never stopped searching (Applause, Please!).

The effects of her illness, attacks from trusted loved ones, and my father's death at an early age have left my siblings and me devastated, not to mention the succeeding generations. But we persist.

My objectives with the TOLM system so far have been largely to heal the trauma of my childhood and my relationship with my mother, the effects of which have been stupendous. My mother is receptive to anything that will help her heal and astute enough to reject what will not help. The insights that have been revealed to me during the TOLM system have helped us both to heal beyond measure.

Now, it seems that it is time to heal the adult trauma that I have inflicted upon myself through anxiety and self-sabotage.

Normally, I would have interpreted yesterday's anxiety attack as a huge failure and shut down completely, unable to do anything, feeling worthless, inept, and every negative name in the book that you can think of. Because of my success with the TOLM, however, I didn't do this. Set and I (as Heru)went to war and last night, Tehuti loaned me his eye. I'm talking about the metaphorein from Ra Un Nefer Amen's Metu Neter vol. 2, p. 137-160.

Previous cycles of the TOLM system had already revealed to me that my anxiety stems from the cry of the baby girl inside of me who new that no one was going to come to her rescue in the midst of the worst of the worst. Why then would I have my worst anxiety attack of the cycle when I received something that I wanted very much?

For forty years, my expectations in life have been based upon the fact that no help would come. This has tainted my perception of what "help" is. Even when I have been able to recognize "help" as help, I've felt unworthy of it. If I accepted help, I would sabotage it just to prove my unworthiness.

Understanding this blessed insight isn't enough. I've got to change the beliefs that feed it. That means that this meditation cycle has officially shifted focus from my original objective of obtaining money to healing my anxiety. That is not to say that the money won't come, but it is no longer the prize. Ashe!

I need to say something here about compassion. Our people (the African diaspora) have suffered and lost so much at the hands of Europeans and wannabes. Now, when we have the capacity to assess what has happened to us, our brightest scholars are so blinded by hopes of European-influenced opulence that we are seemingly unable to cohesively understand what has happened to us. Even the "conscious" brothas and sistas, are blinded by European assessments of our responses to trauma. You never know what someone is going through or why. We are all different and we all incarnated with different strengths, weaknesses, and agendas. Be compassionate in your assessment of others without judging too quickly or too harshly. If any people deserve a second look and reconsideration, it's us by us.

That's it for now. Until next time,
Hetep

Tree of Life Meditation System -- Heru Revisited

Hetep Everyone,

Sleep is a powerful thing. You go to bed with questions and you wake up with answers. You go to bed confused and wake up with clarity. It's wonderful; therefore, I want to continue my discussion on Heru.

Heru was named Horus by the Greeks. Heru is the Christ image, the God who has arisen from the dead. In Kemetic (Ancient Egyptian) terminology, one interpretation of this is that Heru is the representation of our waking consciousness as opposed to the consciousness we use when we are asleep. Sleep is symbolic of death. Not knowing this or, perhaps, wanting to mislead others, Europeans misinterpreted the story of Heru and named the Kemetic book about him, The Book of the Dead. The True title is The Pert Em Hru (Becoming Awake or Coming Forth By Day). Heru is God arisen from the grave -- the grave being your subconscious mind. Heru is God freed from the limitations of simply running our subconscious bodily functions like blinking our eyes.

That same energy that moves our bodily functions in synchronous orbit moves the planets around the sun, the sun around the galaxy, the galaxy around the universe, and the universe around the cosmos. As such, we are made in the likeness of God -- As above, so below. We are creators with the potential to command that energy, but first, we must wake up to the conscious knowledge and experience of it.

On a personal note, I have information about my potential, but not conscious knowledge or experience of it. This is why I persist in my participation of the meditation cycles. I want to consciously experience the power of creating, not just my own reality, but a reality that is harmoniously aligned for all.

This is why I was so disappointed yesterday in my performance. I refused to acknowledge my own power, locking myself into activities that did not fit the form and function of my objectives. I did not use the tools available to me in the Heru Sphere of the Tree of Life. These tools consist of a type of meditation called Men Ab. Briefly, Men Ab consists of:

• Pausing -- Stilling the Will -- Stop what you're doing
• Breathing -- taking slow deep breaths similar to those used in nightly meditation
• Using imagery like the Sesh Metut Neter -- imagine wearing the crown shown in the above picture to remind you of uncorrupted power
• Chanting or singing the Hekau -- Words of Power given in the Metu Neter Vol. 1: The Great Oracle of Tehuti and the Egyptian System of Spiritual Cultivation
• Thinking, feeling, or doing what will fit the form and function of your objectives

Using these tools could have restored me back to consciousness. Instead, I was locked in a trance state of dis-empowering thoughts and images all of which were emotional and fear-based. This is okay. It simply means that I am getting to the source of things that have blocked me. Those blockages are alive and want to stay that way.

The blockages are called Set, known today as Satan. Heru fights Set. Our enlightened consciousness (our True Will) fights to subdue our limited ego. This is so much more than mere "will power". Will power is forcing yourself to do something you know you should do. The Will of Heru is thinking, feeling, and acting based upon an indwelling intelligence (the subconscious mind of the True Self). The indwelling intelligence is directly linked to the perfectly balanced power that moves the universe in synchronous harmony. This means that thoughts, feelings, and actions based upon the True Will (Heru) cause no conflict and will result in immediate or eventual creative alignment. We access and cultivate this indwelling intelligence through our nightly meditations. The intelligence rises or resurrects itself through our waking consciousness (Heru), during the day, thus the true title of The Book of the Dead -- The Pert Em Hru (Becoming Awake or Coming Forth By Day)

Heru is symbolized as a hawk because in a hawk-like way, we must monitor our thoughts, feelings, and actions according to our True Will, protecting them from our limited ego (Set). During the day, Set produces for us a reality through images, beliefs, and affirmations. Like a hawk, we must learn to see through Set's illusions with clarity, using our inner eye (known as the Third Eye, Tehuti's Eye, the Pineal Gland) to follow our True Will as we create a more balanced reality.

Now, I am ready to talk about Het-Heru, but I will do so on a different post.

Until next time,
Hetep